Ashley Boyer, Rape Survivor Mother Raising Her Child

Ashley_Boyer-193x302Ashley Boyer’s Story — raising her son who was conceived out of rape when she’d been abducted for days and raped. Ashley resides in Michigan and is available for speaking —

Well it all started with me making some poor decisions in my life, and I basically became homeless with nowhere to go. So in a effort to better myself, I reached out to an old friend in New York who agreed to help me, and off to New York I went. At first,everything was great. I was working every day and things were going great. Then my friend and I started to not get along so great. Since I had a job, I decided to rent a room — something I had done in the past living in New York, and it was through someone I knew and who I’d met when I’d lived out there before. So I moved in and was there for about three days when things started to change and I knew something wasn’t right.

Though my childhood was abusive, I know now that I was pretty sheltered in that small community from much of the horrors of this world. Of course I’d heard of such a thing as sex trafficking, but had no idea that it was a part of America, and could not fathom that I’d ever be targeted. So I was utterly confused when I was attacked while heading to a subway in Manhattan, abducted, and taken to a place only to find that the abductors already had all of my belongings there. I was then told that I’d been “sold” to this man who called himself a pimp. I’d never heard of such a form of slavery in the modern U.S., but it’s real and I lived through it – beaten and threatened with death for refusing to submit to his sinister plan. On one occasion, in order to try to prove to me that my situation was hopeless, he took me into the city during the day and cut me with a razor in front of people in a busy train station. No one stopped – no one said a thing! He laughed and said, “Don’t you get it? No one cares about you! No one cares what happens to you.”

Eventually I escaped with the help of a bus driver who did care, only to be found at a train station by a friend of his who held me captive as well, saying he would hurt me in ways I could never prove because he wouldn’t leave marks. And then he raped me. Later that night, I got a hold of his phone and called a friend who was able to get help for me to be rescued. I remember being told, “Don’t worry, you’re safe now.”

Immediately, I went to a hospital to get tested. I waited for my results and was so relieved when they said I was clean — I thought, “I can move on with my life” and I left New York. Experiencing some pain, and wanting to be absolutely certain I was clean, I returned to a hospital a month later to make sure AIDS or other STDs that don’t show up right away had not surfaced. I was clean, but the doctor said she believed the trauma caused some other issues which were causing some of my pain, and that I was infertile. At that point, I was happy to be safe and STD-free, so I just tried to move on with my life from there.

A month later, I became really depressed and thought the random crying spells were just delayed emotions from the traumatic events that had just happened. But then I grew nauseous, among other things. I explained to my cousin how I felt and what the doctor had said and she insisted that I get a second opinion since she suspected I was pregnant. Hearing her suggest this, I couldn’t wait for a doctor’s appointment, and so I went to the dollar store and bought a test. I was so scared! I went in the bathroom and my cousin stood there with me. Even before I was done, it turned positive and it was quite clear then why I had had the physical symptoms of pregnancy — I was indeed pregnant. I went to the hospital that night to be sure and to see how far along I was. They told me I was 12 weeks and 6 days — quite far along. I was in shock and enraged: “How did this happen?! How was this missed? Why me?! How?! No — this can’t be!” I had tried to have a child with a previous boyfriend for two years which resulted in our break up. “How could I be pregnant from this one time by this disgusting person? This must be a dream — this cannot be real!”

As soon as they let my cousin back in, I told her, “This is not a option — I cannot, I CANNOT have this baby! No! I want it out!” But once I calmed down, I realized that I was blessed with a life after I’d been told I would never have children. This was a sign from God and I never really believed in abortion. Abortion is murder and I’m not a murderer! At that point, I chose to keep my baby. Adoption was not a option for me either. I could not just give him away and I’ve always known that he was given to me for a purpose.

Today, I’m happy to say I have a healthy baby boy! He is the best thing that’s ever happened to me, and I truly believe that God gave me this child to save my life. If I wouldn’t have had him, I know I would have continued on a destructive path of poor choices, and would most likely be dead right now. Now that it’s no longer just me, but I have this awesome child to look after, I’m making much better decisions in my life – who I’m friends with, where I live, and what I do with my time. I struggle everyday knowing how he came in this world, but I don’t love him any less or plan to treat him any type of way because of it. It is not his fault how he was created, nor did he ask to be created, but he was created for a reason and he has changed my life in the most positive way! Now I take my son to pray outside of abortion clinics with me so that we can save his little baby friends together!